Jagger gets it

Currently, our church, like so many others, is having outdoor Liturgies as well as live streaming the services so that people can attend with reduced chance of exposure to Coronavirus. In my experiences as an Orthodox Christian, outdoor Liturgies are pretty uncommon. However, in light of everything, the bishops have given permission and we have decided it's the way to go for now. (As one of my friends said "it's the best bad idea we have" - I don't think this is meant to be a dig on the idea per say, simply that no matter what we decide someone will be unhappy.) So, we have been having outdoor Liturgies for several weeks now which requires a lot more prep than one might think and a lot more planning than one would expect, partially because we are in the South, Southern Georgia actually. If you aren't aware, Southern Georgia in the summer is hot. I mean, melt your mascara, stick to yourself hot. The kind of hot that can't ever really be understood unless you have experienced it. Due to this we, as a Parish Council, decided to move Liturgy up an hour in order to try to not melt everyone's mascara and stick to ourselves. (Truly, I'd move it up to whatever time the two amazing men wearing robes over their clothes wanted to hold service, because how they don't just puddle to the ground is something I simply don't understand.) So we are having services outside, in front of the church, with tents over the AV equipment and the altar (we didn't use the tents one morning and the phone used for live stream nearly burst into flames - not making that mistake again). The priest and the chanter are both wearing their robes. By the way, if you don't know what Orthodox priest robes are like, check it out, there's a lot of fabric involved. There's more to set up and more to break down before and after services than usual. We are all wearing masks and following directional signs so that we can socially distance. There's just so many pieces to it, but I'm sure you're getting the picture. 

Ok, so one Sunday morning several weeks ago, I'm standing with my family at Liturgy. We are all wearing our masks and female offspring and I have our heads covered. (This is something we do and the reasoning is quite beautiful. If you're curious about it please feel free to ask.) It was one of the first Sundays we were doing the outdoor Liturgies so we were all learning the nuances so to speak, like where to stand in order to remain in the shade most of service. You can see where this is going. As Liturgy progresses slowly but surely our little piece of land is no longer in the shade. I'm standing there, face and head covered, sweating like I just ran 10 miles. I can feel it running down my back. I thought I was going to fall down. I'm looking at the plastic chair beside me thinking "I'm going to have to sit" (we don't sit much during Liturgy). "If I don't sit I"m going to fall down and that's a whole different issue." Then it happens. Just as I'm thinking "it's time to sit" I feel a cool, sweet breeze come through, my scarf on my head falls loose so that it's hanging on my shoulders instead of wrapped around my neck area and the breeze just cools my whole body instantly. I decided in that moment, that as long as we were outside, I would wear my head covering loose and draping rather than wrapped, because that breeze was able to cool me with it loose. I was able to participate in the rest of Liturgy because of that breeze. It was exactly what I needed.

This kind of thing happens often if we pay attention. Have you ever been in a certain "mood" or felt a level of stress and a song comes on the radio that just tells you what you need to hear? It happens to me regularly. In fact it's often the same song and it's not a song that seems particularly poignant in my opinion, but it works. There have been countless number of times that I have been on my way to work and totally stressed out when this song comes on. Suddenly I find myself singing along, feeling fully empowered. In fact, just this week it happened. 

As a teacher and a mother, there are a lot of unknowns related to school starting that have me stressed out. I have faith that it will all work out just as is it is supposed to, but the questions really make the control "freak" in me nervous. So the other day I was getting really anxious about some things but I had some errands to run and the show must go on. When I got in the car I turned on the radio (as usual). The less than poignant, make me feel empowered song comes on almost immediately, right at the beginning of the song. The next thing I know the radio is blaring (like rattle the windows blaring), I'm singing at the top of my lungs and everything is ok. I don't have the answers, but you better believe that I'm going to "carry on my wayward son" and I know "there will be peace when you are done". I wonder if Kansas ever expected that song to be the thing that gets a crazy middle aged mom/teacher through her stress. Well, whether they did or not, it is. 

See the thing is, often we don't know what we need. I didn't know I needed a breeze and to loosen my head covering the other day at church. I thought I needed to sit down, but it turns out that's what I wanted, not what I needed. Ten years ago, I would have never believed that Carry On My Wayward Son would be a song that empowers me and reminds me I got this. I can't even tell you what I thought my "I got this" song would be, but now I know that every time I hear that song I am reminded there will be peace when I am done. God has placed me exactly where I am supposed to be and He knows exactly what my struggles are. He also knows exactly what I need. He knows when I need a sweet, cool breeze or when I need to hear the perfect song. He knows when I need to stay up late and write or when I need to sit quietly with my thoughts. He knows and He will give it to us, even if it's not what we want. 

Who knew that Jagger and Richards had it figured out all along? "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you find, you get what you need." So try. Don't give up because this is hard. Don't throw in the towel. Look for the moments that remind you "you got this" because He's got you. You've got everything you need in Him.